Where Has She Been?

Published by kappello on

Not posted in a bit, but it’s been a week of fatigue, of my BP and sugar levels going all wonky and I realized a lot of it has to do with psychic sensitivity, which I have high levels of. It is not an easy “gift” part of myself to manage day to day, but it is a part of me and I am working through how to accept it all as part of me, to accept all of me, including these gifts, and how they fit into my life, vocation, all that I am. I will in time.

I have had a bit of scare, another and another, recently my Blood Pressure going as high as 246/136, pulse over 100, couldn’t , move my arm, nausea, was a bit scary.  I have been having issues with breathing and tightness in my chest, pain also in my arm, so they recently did an echo cardiogram and I have dystolic dysfunction in the left valve of my heart.   I thought about whether if I could be reborn, if I would change being this sensitive, and I decided, no. I have come to love who I am as wonky, as emphatic, even oversensitive sometimes, or too balsy, too stubborn. It’s a package deal, so take me for leave me as is. Not to say I haven’t mellowed and gotten more constructive in managing my emphatic gifts and all, but the core of me, I wouldn’t change for anything. It’s who God made me to me and if that means my heart gets a bit damaged in the process, literally and emotionally, well that’s fine with me.  Being hypersensitive, a times a bit impatient, at others too analytical, and at others too “emotional” whatever the hell that means is what makes me a songwriter, poet, blogger, metaphysical minister, essentially the enigma that is me. Love me or leave me, it’s who I am, who I will always be.

Namaste and Shalom

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kappello

Born in New Jersey, August 1965, this Italian-American has always had a great interest in music, particularly the Oldies, Country and Ethnic music, including Irish. For over 10 years Ms. Appello passionately taught ESL to students of varying ages. Grounded if her faith and spirituality, Katherine endured a range of issues, including a great deal of pain, which was finally diagnosed to be associated with Fibromyalgia. The essence and the power of music, of words, allow Katherine to overcome these struggles each and every time. We are all blessed to have Katherine’s strength, wisdom, and words to write “Pray For Me Tonight’