That can be a loaded question. Why, seems like a fairly positive question, one we should all know the answer to, yet it seems we might take decades to figure that out. Why is that?
In part it’s because we have been told by the media, institutions, the fashion industry for example and others what we ought to want, what signifies success, beauty, stability all that. From early on, we are told what we should want and in some cases that poverty and suffering are noble, that misery out of loyalty and duty are noble. We may have a calling as a child, or young adult that we feel strongly about, even have a love in life that we discover in life that is a true love, but we are confused, do we truly want this, are we supposed to embrace this? Do we want the house, or condo in the city, country house and two cars, the wealth, status that is supposed to signify success? What do we want? Do we truly believe the teachings of the spiritual path we were raised with? If we do, okay, awesome, power to it, as long as it’s all achieved ethically, and honestly and there has been a real exploration of self to determine what one truly wants, who one truly wants in one’s life as friend, colleague, spouse etc…, then great. However to do that, you have to really do an exploration of who you truly are and what you truly have a strong sense of affiliation for, with because it truly resonates with you.
Thing is, we do know what we want, who we truly love, have in our heart, but too often are afraid, sometimes there are legitimate red flags, and they have to be paid attention to. There are times when we put up walls, we make excuses to stay in misery, in the prisons we are in, to not have the life we truly want, be with the person we truly want to be with long term, share our life with long term, live that vocation we truly know in our heart is ours to live, even that spiritual path that resonates with us. We do at a certain point know what we point, or at certain points know what we want, truly want, that are not just out of rebellion etc.., but truly what resonates with every part of us, in our hearts, deep. It is scary to acknowledge what we truly want because then we have to come out of the comfort zone, safety net, actually come out of the fight or flight mode, out of survival mode mindset, and be willing to stand at the edge of the cliff and jump, maybe with no parachute and hope an angel is there to catch us and help us land. We can get so caught up in the safety of things, of what we have been told and taught, that we get stuck, like in thick mud and can’t figure out how to move out of that and forward. It’s scary to really delve into the heart, spirit and soul, have that dialogue with self and even with someone who will work with you to have that dialogue, so you do have to figure out what you really do want and will then hold you accountable to actions to actually make it happen.
However, it is a beautiful thing when you do, as you start that journey, you will see that it will get easier and there will be greater clarity as you move forward with each step. Down deep, we do know what we really want and what is best for us, we can come out of confusion, out of the muck of today’s crazy world and have clarity, we can. We have to be willing to have that inner dialogue no matter how uncomfortable, be willing to make choices, decisions, even if some are uncomfortable and others won’t like them, those closest to us. We do know the path we are meant to take, one that is happy, healthy, one of true love, fulfilling our vocation, our potential, our God given potential.
Namaste, Shalom and Amen