Today I went for my meeting with the Rabbi at T&V, and I was expecting a lot of questions, a lot of testing and usually when you approach a rabbi about conversion they are supposed to give you a tough time about it, so I was expect a lot of resistance. Life is full of surprises.
What I got was once again a feeling of being home, having found my way home and being told that I had already being the doing part of Judaism in several ways, even with my music, my poetry, inspiring other, with my blog in seeking to inspire, empower etc…. I was already attending Shabbat Services, attended Holiday Services, so except for the Kosher and daily prayers, certain other things I have to learn, I was already living Jewish. It’s really an interesting journey and to have finally found home for my spiritual self and finally be really recognizing my gifts and appreciating them no matter what any nay sayers have to say at the age of 52 is pretty cool. I even put out my holiday album today on bandcamp https://katherineappello.bandcamp.com/a…/as-the-season-nears Life is pretty good right now and hopefully with God smiling on me I will be performing monthly in a music series with a dear friend and fellow artist. Hopefully at some point soon a good indie label out there, with integrity for the artist, really high integrity will come across my stuff, and sign me on to do spoken word projects and also as a songwriter, who will respect my faith, my Sabbath. Will life be perfect now that I have come home spiritually and have determined to stick with my true heart vocationally, that I have I would say certainty of my soulmate? No, life is not perfect. Are there things in my past that hurt me and left a scar that may never fully heal? Yeah, but I can choose two paths with that. I can choose to hold on to it and let it be a wall that never allows me to move forward, never allows me to love, to live, to create etc.., never to take any risk or chance, that keeps me always looking for problems and to be caught up in problems because that is the norm? Yuk. The other path is to say “Ok it sucked, yuk, but not who I am now, not who I want to be, not who I will be and to choose to live, love etc..and screw that past!!” I prefer option number 2. That is how I am working to live my life, that is what I am striving for. With the help of God, of good people and community around me I will achieve that.
The next step in my faith path, moving to living, eating kosher, prayers daily and whatever else it all entails and the later on of course in a year a formal ceremony to formally welcome me into the fold. Artistically, hopefully there will be a chance to be signed on with an indie record label, the chance to do spiritual music, and spoken word, as well songs about love, relationships and some political folk stuff, live performances. That is the hope and of course to keep selling on my own site as well, so the past is a postcard with lesson notes to be remembered, but it is not to be a never ending quagmire that I can not get free of, or out of, the present and the future are beautiful blank canvasses waiting only for me to have the guts to fill them out with glorious pictures, hues and brushstrokes that include an amazing relationship with my soulmate.
Shalom and Amen