We find ourselves filling our calendars with events, so many events, so many things to do, and none of is really in line with the calling of our hearts, spirit and soul, our vocation, true self and vocation, true interests. It can be deeper than that.
We can be afraid of alone time, of being with ourselves of what we might remember, recall, of memories even memories of those we love coming up and having to deal with all that means, represents etc.. Being able to love being with ourselves and create, use those memories etc.. to create is a a great thing if we can learn to do so. We might want companionship and have lots of people we know, but de we really have deep bonded day to day heart, spirit soul open to you raw, share common path. companionship? That is very different than having a bunch of people we know, might hang out with. I have never been one to load up with activity for the sake of activity and running from myself or memories etc.. because they are my creative fuel. As we mature we learn to manage them constructively as we face them, but hopefully at some point you realize you learn to slim down your life, schedule, even our inner psyche, and get very focused. We stop being busy for busy sake, stop running from yourself, from life, and you take the time to form one or two very deep bonds that are titanium strong, where both of you lay yourselves bare, heart, spirit and soul not judgement, none of that, just love, caring and friendship. We learn to say what is in the heart, to focus on following our heart, true heart, true path, can face all we have to face, remove all the cobwebs and live the life you are meant to live vocation wise and in general. Busy for busy sake and running from yourself etc.., not a good thing. Having a lot of people in our lives, but no profound open ourselves to, be raw with mutually with, missing a major part of life’s journey. To do any of this, one has to de-clutter one’s life, one’s heart, spirit, soul, psyche, no other way to achieve this. I know and though it is not easy to de-clutter the heart, spirit and soul of the cobwebs of life and life’s gunk, it is essential to do so. It is also essential to focus on one’s authentic path in life, not what one thinks ought to be one’s path because it is what everyone expects it to be of you. Namaste!
As for me, while there are many things in this world that could get my attention, I have decided I need to focus, and so the focus will be on the artistic, on working with artistic groups, venues, even within the church, select groups, as well as work on select projects I want to self produce or collaborate on with others. As for events and social activity, I am going to focus on just a select few venues to attend in terms of events, not be going in a million different direction even in that sense. Focus is key, even with projects, but I also have to make sure I have the passion present in whatever I do. I have to sure that even in my friendships I jump in with open arms and open heart, raw as is my authentic self. It may work out, it may not, not the point, life is a journey and you make it. I am also praying for a very small, select group of friends to be in my life that share my faith, conservative classical liberal worldview, my interest in the artistic, cultures of Europe. I am also praying for a best friend and companion who will share also in my artistic projects, a best friend with whom there will be mutual trust, give and take, equal give and take, mutual respect, true equal partnership and friendship. Even a friendship is a partnership and hopefully a partnership of equals where both sides value the other, want to engage with the other on a myriad of levels, spend time with the other exploring different things. It is encouraging the other in their potential, being there through thick and thin, being really open and raw with the other, at least with a real authentic and deep friendship and a BFF situation. I have never done the busy for busy sake, or to run from myself or life etc.., hope I never do. I am going to focus on the Alpha artist group at the church and work on my artistic projects and I am going to pray for that tight night circle of deep connections and that one deeper than deep BFF connection. I am focusing on three things authentic heart on my sleeve self, focus, and decluttering as central themes for life and also the artistic.