Knowing When To Walk Away
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We all have dreams, we all have things we feel passionately about, have invested so much of ourselves in, our hopes into, so how do you just walk away from that? When is it time to walk away? Whether it’s a relationship, a project, they are like our children, a part of us and we have such high hopes for them to succeed, to thrive, we may put so much time, effort, resources into that relationship, that project and yet it yields no fruit, it withers, it doesn’t blossom, so how long is long enough and how do we discern whether it is time?
Take a relationship, let’s start with that one. A relationship should be a two way street, one where both are sharing to the depth of their heart, spirit and soul, sharing the good, the bad and the sad without hesitation day in and day out, be each other’s inspiration, best friend, rock of Gibraltar so to speak, and if you are a Christian, in and through Christ as a team. Both should be in tandem in regards to goals, hopes, dreams for the present and the future, sharing that on a day to day basis, having lots in common, even if they also have certain interests of their own. They should make each other feel good about life, hopeful about stuff, but also be able to issue tough love to each other, not in a mean way, but in a loving way and feel really comfortable enough to accept it from each other. If all that is shut down, non existent, there is no way to have that, attempts have been made, failed miserably and both parties are miserable together, make each other miserable together etc…, live as strangers, as two ships passing in the night day in and day out, well not healthy for anyone, might just be merciful to part ways and build new lives apart. Doesn’t mean you don’t care on a general human level and can’t wish the best for each other, you should. that situation might be one where all the signs are there and time to part ways.
What about a project, a career choice? If you have initiated a project, a vocational path, are doing everything you ought to be doing to be successful, and I mean crossing all the T’s, dotting all the I’s etc..and yet nothing is moving, nothing is succeeding with that project, that vocational path, that bud is not blooming, seed is not sprouting, nothing, zip, month after month, year after year, a pow wow with the Holy Spirit, all the angels and saints might be in order. It might be that what you are doing is your great awesome idea, but not at all in line with what The Lord, the Big Kahuna as I used to refer to God when I was younger and watched Franki Valli films might want to see happening. We might have some really great, awesome ideas, for projects, for our vocational path, such as I had for my artistic path to be a singer-songwriter, but God had a different path of ministry in mind and if I had not been stubborn in wanting to succeed my way I would have been a minister of the arts within the church a long time ago and fulfilled what God knew was my strength, coaching, guiding, coordinating, writing. I see around me the stubbornness of people wanting something very much and thinking how as great an idea it might be, it might not be what God wants to see happening. However, each of us has to make the journey and learn in our own way, so all I can do is pray for the proverbial “ahha” moment to come to all. I hope I will have my such moment in all things very quickly and know when to walk away, that it always be sooner rather than later, so that I can then be doing God’s will, in his infinite wisdom not that of my own ego.