What My Childhood Taught Me

Published by kappello on

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Replace the He with She, and that is what I gained, learned from the mess of my parent’s divorce and being used as a chess piece by both sides.  I know my mom loved me, but she in different ways would also give me this message of “nothing lasts forever”.  What I did was create a life of constant temporaries, of constant flux, which in turn wreaked emotional havoc on me and destroyed my well being.  This even created instability in my faith life, made it hard for me to commit to any particular faith path, even within the Christian faith.  When as a child you get the subliminal message and then reinforced message in different ways that nothing lasts forever, nothing can, even faith is hard to sustain on a deep level, even connection with God is hard to sustain on a deep level.  Now 50 something I find myself as the poem says wishing I had something, something more long term in my vocational path, a companion that I had built lasting memories with.  I wish I had not been given a message of nothing last forever, but that there are things that can last with intention, faith and right investment emotionally etc.. put forward.  I wish I had been given that balance, taught that because I think I would have gone less in circles.  Please remember that the phrase “Nothing lasts forever”, not really true.  WIth right nurturing etc.., solid deep faith and spiritual life can last forever, healthy relationships can last a good long time.  With marriage for example, even if the marriage ends, the relationship can still be one of friendship, caring and good will towards the other, if the intent and nurturing of it is there.  Our spiritual body also is every lasting as Scripture tells us, so there are things that last forever. Take heart and never let that be what defines and drives your life, or you could end up going in circles, too many circles for too long.

Shalom


kappello

Born in New Jersey, August 1965, this Italian-American has always had a great interest in music, particularly the Oldies, Country and Ethnic music, including Irish. For over 10 years Ms. Appello passionately taught ESL to students of varying ages. Grounded if her faith and spirituality, Katherine endured a range of issues, including a great deal of pain, which was finally diagnosed to be associated with Fibromyalgia. The essence and the power of music, of words, allow Katherine to overcome these struggles each and every time. We are all blessed to have Katherine’s strength, wisdom, and words to write “Pray For Me Tonight’