Childhood can be heaven, limbo or hell, depends on the adults around you, it can even be a combo dish, again depends on those around you. People talk about a lost childhood and in a sense yes when your childhood is unstable, filled with a lot of negativity whatever that negativity may be, in whatever dose it may be, however harsh it may be, a piece of you is lost. However, it is up to you whether you stay stuck there or whether you decide you will break free of those chains and at some point be a happy inner child and a happy adult that lives life to the fullest, happy, healthy, wise, thriving and prospering on different levels, making the journey along those lines. It may take a short while to get there, or it may take a very long hard road. Hopefully, you meet some good people to help you along there. It’s also never too late to go after the dream you had growing up, even if it’s not exactly the way you pictured it growing up, meditate, pray, be guided as to how once you make that choice to let go, forgive for yourself not them, and live, truly live, how those healthy dreams can become reality. Move through and past any inner negative self talk and obstacle, if necessary find a group online that will encourage you, pray with you and for you, meditate with you. Your childhood junk etc.. does not need to determine your whole life, unless you, unless we let it.
Shalom and Amen