Unhealthy Boundaries 5 and 6
Every heart the phrase “familiarity breeds contempt”, well if you are meeting people for the first time, you need to assess their level of comfort in connecting to people and at what pace. Sometimes it’s geographical or cultural. Latin Americans, those from the Islands tend to be expressive, open, as do Italians, whereas Mid-West Americans are not as expressive and not likely to give you a big hug and have that same larger than life persona that these other groups might have. There may also be a religious component, if the person is of a particular faith, how you relate especially initially to women, to those you first meet may have certain protocols, so the intimacy levels of any first or initial meetings can be dictated by any number of factors, which need to be respected. There is also personal dignity, having personal dignity and respect. What about connection, can a connection be unhealthy? Yes, it can be. Any connection in our lives can be unhealthy if it becomes all-consuming, or if rather than helping us grow as a person during the relationship in a way that we are realizing our full potential, we are creating a beautiful life with that person as a partner in the journey, then great. If that relationship takes over our lives, so we give up work, time with friends etc.. repeatedly, it becomes the center of our breathing, existing etc.., not healthy. In any relationship there has to be balance, it can’t be your be all end all of things. In all things, balance! Always let us remember that word, balance!