Fallout, Good or Bad?

Northern Lights

Often in life, we will do our best to make things work, give situations, people, relationships chance after, after chance to work, and we do it for any number of reasons. I am not saying give up at the first sign of trouble, but often we are so afraid of fallout if we make changes, walk away from what is dead, burnt toast, what can’t be salvaged, or is harming our ability to grow as a person, spiritually in every way, making us consistently miserable, so we wait it out, hoping a miracle will salvage it.

The problem with that is that the longer we wait, the longer we chew on burnt toast so to speak, the greater the fall out when it just reaches a point of breaking, where we just are forced to change things or walk away.  It’s like getting a cut and hoping it will heal, or just running water over it and thinking that can disinfect it, it can’t.  The longer you let that cut go, the more the chance of a deadly infection.  Often we think we are doing the noble thing for others by staying where things are dead, where there is no life, no deep connection etc.., it is so burnt out, can’t be salvaged, though we have done our best. What of the others? Those others may actually be hurt more the longer one waits, tries to force things to work that can’t. All we can do is give it our best, but after we have done, really given it our best.

The longer we wait, the greater the fall out when it just reaches a point of breaking, where we just are forced to change things or walk away. Often we think we are doing the noble thing for others by staying where things are dead, where there is no life, no deep connection etc.., it is so burnt out, can’t be salvaged, though we have done our best. What of the others? Those others may actually be hurt more the longer one waits, tries to force things to work that can’t. All we can do is give it our best, but after we have done, really given it our 150%, and so has the other party or if they haven’t but we have, whether it’s career or personal life related, that is all we can do. I realize now that I did myself and mom a great disservice by not going out on my own. I felt I had to stay because duty and obligation, her not speaking English well, how could I just up and go have a life, leave her alone. In doing that, she never got out there to learn English, to make friends, build a community for herself. By my staying, I did no service to myself or her. When we see clearly something is burnt toast, DOA, can’t be salvaged, we need a plan and we need to have the courage to walk away. Yes, there will be some chaos maybe, some hurt, but in the long term, it will be positive for everyone, though it may not seem that way at the time. Something to think about.

Life Lesson 36 and 37

45 life Lessons

Are you like the IRS in terms of your life, constantly scrutinizing every aspect of your life, of the could have, should have, if only etc…?  Are you your own worst critic and nightmare? Well, join the club.  You are not alone, and I used to be that way.  I have had a hard time not letting my past mistakes be a wall that kept me stuck in that past and not moving forward in the way I truly felt I should.  I know that no one can move me forward but me.  Yes people can encourage, guide etc.., but ultimately through daily spiritual practice, wellness, meditation, prayer, forgiving self in the knowledge that the Creator has forgiven me and wishes me to live a better, wiser healthier life, make wise choices for my own sake, I can let that wall completely crumble, but I know it’s not going to happen overnight.  Still if I never get started, it never will, which is why joining the gym was important to me, and starting the yoga, regular exercise will be important, shift the energy, mindset, and thus life. Doesn’t mean a perfect life, but one not stuck in a loop of auditing myself and my life constantly based on past mistakes, learning from that, moving forward and not repeating those mistakes, making better choices, wiser ones.  That will mean figuring out what to let go of whether that’s people, places, particular belief structures.  The one thing I can never release is a belief in God and the overall holistic understanding of life lived according to the Ten Commandments.  God is just logical for me, as nothing could have been created, organized etc.. even the laws of gravity and science without a brilliant mind and seeing the human struggle of good and evil Biblical understanding of life, even if strictly at a metaphysical level is what makes sense and is logical.  Certain things will probably always remain a part of my life, but I am at  place in life where I am looking at things from a wellness and holistic perspective more than a theology perspective, so for example certain biblical truths make sense from a wellness and science viewpoint for me anyway.  For others it may not be that way, but I can only believe what I trust in my core being to be true.  Even if organized religion, or religious bureaucracy , the uber liberal direction of the Roman Catholic Church doesn’t sit well with me and is not appealing to me, nor the layers of bureaucracy,  and I may let that part go, doesn’t mean there is nothing of value to learn from the traditional teachings. Reincarnation, that just doesn’t jive for me, this endless loop of coming and going, back and forth etc.., meditation, a certain detachment, as Jesus taught, in but not of the world, yes, but reincarnation, doesn’t jive, this constant loop.  Again, I am looking at everything now, seeking to look at it from what makes sense, truly makes sense based on what I see in this struggle of good and evil, what makes sense to embrace philosophically, metaphysically and scripturally, spiritually for holistic wellness and that of society, including in regards to sexuality?  That is how I am seeking to make decisions, even in regards to matters of faith.  As I make my journey through the rest of life, I have to be careful not to be an IRS auditor in overdrive in my life and make decisions based on holistic wellness and what truly authentically makes sense, rings true, such as Capitalism, Never Marxism, Never Socialism. 

Shalom and Amen

Everything You Do

Everything You Do

As a kid, even as a teen, you are not in a position of full discernment when it comes to decision making, but life is a journey one where discernment of decisions etc… comes from being able to step back and say “is this for my greater good and the greater good, is it respecting boundaries etc..?” Yes nurture, type of nurture, and all that plays a role in shaping you, but when does the scapegoating end?  When do we take responsibility for our life choices, stop blaming God, Parents etc.. At what point does one take ownership of one’s life, one’s decisions etc..?  Hopefully early on in life.  It’s easier to play the blame game, and it means you don’t ever have to grow up, make the hard choices or even accept the consequences of any choices you make when they go wrong, or if they were clearly the wrong choice.  It’s important that we be able to make the choice, with reflection, informed, with clarity and accept the results, consequences etc…Yeah, it’s not always fun being all grown up, but staying in wonderland forever is kind of a sad place to be.  I hope we all can come to that place where we honor wisdom, discernment etc.. and the fact that at a certain point in life whatever choices we make we own and the consequences as well. 

Shalom and Amen

 

Faith and Wisdom, Great Marriage

Emotions and Meaning

Faith and Wisdom truly a marriage made in heaven, when the journey is made with integrity and willingness to actually learn and understand.  Faith should never be blind faith or faith just because your family has always been whatever religion they are.  I have been on a journey, gone through a maize, long and winding road looking at religious traditions and faith, what it means to me.  I respected my family’s Roman Catholic faith tradition, but i felt I had to explore and know if that was truly the faith I knew to be truth and in line with the scripture I believe to be the  Spiritual and Objective Truth that can guide life wisely.  It took me a long time and even my sort of saying to God, well I can do it all my way and life will be awesome, don’t really need you, though I do believe you exist and the scriptures.  It took my banging my head, in terms of life experience, a few times and very unpleasantly to really come to see what faith is all about, to see what it is about for me.  For me faith, spirituality, and choice of Roman Catholicism comes from the understanding that scripture being Christian is a way of life, coming to understand that.  The Cannon of the Catholic faith which is distilled through a multi faceted lens, including sociology, and science offers a holistic picture of objective truth and how to live one’s life.  Wisdom comes from experiences, from having gone through a journey of self reflection, reflection of ,one’s life, the ups and downs, choices made, consequences of those choices and alignment with scripture and the RC Cannon.  When I look at that, my life, my choices etc.. I realize that a part of life, I did not operate with fullness of wisdom, of truth, emotional discernment and such.  That had negative results for my life, for me as well.   So in my wisdom, understanding all this, I realized objective truth is extremely important in how I live my life, the choices I make, realizing that they can not be made on emotion and what I want, my in the moment whims of what I want and only that. Faith in objective truth, in how that helps to live a life that gives guidance in order to make smart choices is very important.  At least for me it is and with that I can plan my near future with great clarity, even as I am firm in Christ in the moment. It is truly a blessing. 

Shalom and Amen

Tired, Ready to Quit?

Don't Quit

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCi3wJsr-YrIQKYolaQM_9OQ

It’s been a long and winding road and I have had faith that upon finding my true path, calling life would turn around, I could say goodbye to all reliance on government, once and for all, I could see an abundant life, not only financially, but in every way.  The fibromyalgia, however, pushing through it day after day has temporarily worn me out, so where I don’t write songs anymore, though I did have an inspiration for a poem, which I recently recorded and posted on soundcloud.  As I read this poem I came across, it resonated with me.  I am promoting the blog, the upcoming webinar, doing my best to change my life, my financial picture, yet no changes, so it would seem.  That is not entire true, not really.  I’ve made the decision to change my path of wellness, will be discussing this with my doctor, seeing about going to homeopathic remedies.  I am determined to be proactive, so I looked up gym and spa membership near me, found two potential candidates.  I will check both out, see the vibes I get and start on the path to change because for anything to change, I need to first make changes within my own self and lifestyle.  Quitting, saying I am tired and just giving up would be the easy way to go, but then Fibromyalgia and the Devil would win, something I refuse to allow.  Is quitting and option?  No, no it is not.  That’s not to say I won’t take it easy on the exercise understanding the limits of Fibromyalgia, but quitting is not n option.

Life Lesson 34 and 35

45 life Lessons

When people think of miracles, they often think of Fourth of July spectacular something or the religious mystic type stuff.  We think of them in terms of ancient myth, something that is hocus pocus.  Here is the thing, if we don’t believe in miracles, in the impossible, then we have no science, no music, no creativity because miracles are not just about those spectacular religious mystical experiences. Really miracles are in a sense the wonders of life, of talent, of nature, how it works, the seasons, the winds, oceans, different species of fish and fauna, the whole process of conception, birth and life.  It’s all such an amazing daily miracle, despite Lucifer’s Ego influence and any evil we see.  As I push my way through fibromyalgia each day is a miracle, each day I am here writing this blog, not in bed crashing, in pain etc… is a miracle, though my allergies have kicked in overtime these past weeks and it has been draining as hell.  We need to Believe in miracles and believe in them in all sizes, see what happens in our lives when we do, affirm it verbally.  Life is a rose with thorns, truly is the best analogy of life.  However, the thorns can not take away from the beauty that is the rose.  Yes, life can throw us some real curveballs, as I well know.  They can be minor ones or heavy duty ones, devastating ones.  We have two choices no matter how soft or hard the curveball that comes at us, if we can’t avoid it and sometimes we can if we really paid attention.  We can either be the life long or long term victim, lashing out, giving up on life, on everyone including ourselves, run and hide, hate not forgive, poison ourselves and the world around us.  That’s one choice and it is a choice.  The other choice is we look honestly at the situation, maybe realize our own choices created that situation, get to changing destructive, self destructive patterns, mindset, so we don’t repeat those, how we make choices, decisions, to make better ones.  If we don’t allow the thorns to bleed us to death, we can learn a great deal, we can grow in ways we could not have even imagined.  Let’s believe in miracles, even small ones, the smallest ones, and lets not let any thorns bleed us to death, but rather be a teaching moment, noticing the rose and becoming stronger and a better person for it. 

Shalom and Amen

Joy and Thriving

Emotions and Meaning

Joy and Thriving, a wonderful marriage.  Joy is in a sense I guess a by product of happiness or a companion of happiness.  Joy means you love life, love community etc…, there are things you have a deep love and affinity for, that are authentic to who you are.  That joy allows you to dream, follow your dreams, pursue them in ways that are very healthy, absent of fear.  Love doesn’t fear, even failure, it sees even that as an opportunity to learn, grow.  Joy has a great ability to bring life and light to dark places, situations.  If you ave this joy, then you have connection to the divine, frequency of positive thought, discipline and therefore, you have connection to frequency of positive actions, reactions.  Notice how things are beautifully interconnected, they flow one into the other.  The same goes with actions, they are cascades often times, a thought leading to another thought leading to action and reaction, leading to another action and reaction.  Emotions are not in a vacuum, neither are thoughts or actions, that is the beauty of being human, of being made in the image of the creator.  Yes we have fallen, and we do have the EGO, the dark side that can lead us to take erroneous actions, but if we can conquer that dark side, connect to the creator to that joy, all the positive aspects of emotions, we can have a society that is one more of light than dark.  Due to free will, it does come down to us at the end of the day.

Shalom and Amen

Objective Truth, Why?

If-there-is-no-truth-no

What keeps making me pulling me back out of secularism to Roman Catholicism?  This pretty much sums it up and I was having this two day interaction on twitter and when this person said there is no truth, truth is a myth, it really threw me and I asked questions.  If there is no truth, no objective truth I asked then why should we have laws, Constitutions, why not let everyone prostitute themselves, traffickers traffic, people steal, rape, after all no harm, and if there is no truth then there can’t be harm inflicted and if there is not harm inflicted then no need for law, and order, or consequences.  They were in total shock that I would say such a thing, of course there is right and wrong, has to be law and order.  I pointed out, if there is no body of authority to put forth the parameters of right or wrong, of boundaries etc.. how do you know what is right or wrong, what boundaries are sacred and healthy, wise.

Without objective truth than truth can change with with the wind and that is one thing that is a flaw in the Protestant world, Church, there is no singular, clear body of Cannon Law and Truth. One of the reasons I am pulled to go back to the Roman Catholic faith, it’s that there is clarity because the Church studies the Bible from various points and also works with the sciences integrated with philosophy and theology.  It’s not Sola Scriptura, but a truly holistic approach.  This Pinetrest  image summarizes why I am pulled back to the Catholic faith.  If only my exhausting allergies would let up I could get to church and Legion of Mary meetings. 

Shalom and Amen

Life Lesson 28 and 29

45 life Lessons

Life is not stagnant, so we have to be careful not to get stagnant, not to get too complacent when things are really good, nor should we get stuck when things are bad to where we make them even worse by getting into a quagmire of despair. Life is fluid, and so we have to be fluid, while still working towards our vocation, dreams.  Friendship, and community, you don’t realize how important they are until you feel sick, or different circumstances crop up and without friends, community to reach out to, to reach out to you, it really sucks.  Insurance, all of that matters, but at the same time i won’t make you laugh, lift your spirits, but community, friendship will.  Friendship is one of life’s priorities. 

Shalom and Amen

Integrity and Happiness, Great Pair

Emotions and Meaning

Integrity, an important trait one that seems to be lacking often these days, but what is integrity?  It is not narcissism, that’s for sure.  It is being authentic in your worldview, in your faith, being your natural, organic, authentic self, no putting on masks to get to where you want to be etc…, raw you with honesty, truth, ethics, dependability, even when you are being very creative.  Integrity is what determines the state of your inner being.  This, integrity, living your life authentically and in this way gives you happiness because you are content with the blessings you have, are not envying, not seeking to destroy others to reach the top of the ladder, but you are still doing your best, being your best, realizing your full potential, following that inspired vocation and path that the Creator of the universe and you put into your being.  Maybe we need to look at what mask we are wearing to try and be what others think we ought to be or what we think we ought to be in order to reach the top, especially if that means destroying others, sacrificing our very soul, and who knows what else.  Maybe we ought to think about whether or not we want to leave a legacy to present and future generations of integrity and happiness or the total opposite, maybe, just maybe.

Namaste, Shalom and Amen