Life is about doing, and though I don’t have a full recording studio, doesn’t mean I can’t share my work in some form, so enjoy. This is just the beginning. Please subscribe. Please support this blog with a donation, using paypal: firstname.lastname@example.org
Life is a rose with thorns, it is never just the rose, and we must accept the thorns as we embrace the rose at times. It does not mean that we must allow the thorns to piece us or that we must necessarily bleed to where we lose sight of the rose, the beauty of the rose.
Sometimes the Lord will call us to something, to a vocation, a calling, a project a path, something that will be a beautiful rose with so much potential, so much potential for growth and faith development, but have thorns and we can get deflated, we can get discouraged. Some might even see that others seem more apt to move thing along, to know what to do with the situation etc…, have a better grasp of things, feel they can’t do this, while other person seems to feel easy breezy know exactly what needs to be done and how, the whole enchilada. The Lord may have you in a situation where you see clearly what has to be done etc.., the other person/s don’t and it’s frustrating, so you lose sight of the rose, see only the thorns that pierce your heart with frustration and anxiety. That has been the case with me and a current endeavor the Lord has given me, a gift, a rose, beautiful rose with so much potential to blood into a full garden of roses. I can’t see that garden bloom if I walk away, if I have no firm staying power, so I have to stay, nurture the garden of roses. Even if there are thorns, I have to shield myself with the Golden Armor of God, with Prayer, Meditation, Faith and move forward. I can not give up, can not walk away, have to see this through for myself, for the church, for this great gift and opportunity that God has given me. There are some really great people I am seeing coming to the church wanting to work with us and teaming up with them, great stuff can happen, and I would hate to lose that opportunity because of a thorn or two, because of others not getting it, not getting what’s needed for the church to thrive and succeed. I would really hate to see that happen. I will pray, meditate, work around all thorns, obstacles etc…. and thank the Lord every day for this gift, opportunity to use my gifts for his glory and for the faith community and my heritage.
This Lent I am reflecting on two things, my roots/who I am and choices (friendships, vocational path) because they matter a great deal.
My ancestral roots, cultural and family roots play a part in who I am. My great grandmother Catherine, my namesake, was a very intuitive and formidable lady. My aunt Mary, also on mom’s side loved to sing, had a great voice. My dad and uncle Joe, like me, great with kids and also our furry friends. My mom, much as she is a perfectionist at times and it has been a butting of heads most of our lives, is where I get my moxy from. My multi-lingualism is due to my family growing up speaking Italian with mom, having spend a year in Argentina as a child, going to school there, and then keeping up with the language on my own after, a blessing. Growing up Catholic, well that also made me a true Classic Liberal Conservative, Federalist Republican. Every part of my family heritage, my culture made me, me and I had not fully embraced that because of what transpired with my parents, their divorce, my dad’s family, the tensions with them and my mom. I guess I rejected a big part of who I was and sought to embrace anything but Catholicism and my culture fully. Something changed and now I am ready to fully embrace that, fully explore that. I am ready to reflect on who I am and fully embrace that this Lenten season. I am also ready to look at those connections in my life that are to be nurtured, those that have been in my life for a long time, friendships and also those that show real potential, those that I have reached out to and have said yes to the invitation of friendship, of collaboration. It is time to make choices in relationships in all things that are going to be nourishing, that are going to bring mutual joy, personal growth, and so much more to the table naturally, organically. I have those connections, have made such connections, including ones where I did put out an invite so to speak to engage in friendship and collaboration, and it was met with a positive affirmative yes. The individuals in these connections are really wonderful people I feel the energy very naturally flows both ways and has really great vibes and potential both ways on any number of levels. I can’t waste my energy, time on those who have arms closed when I extend my friendship with arms wide open. Life has too much potential for that. TIme to live it. It also time to focus on what I truly feel I wish to do with my life, the artistic, self produce somehow. I want to create and produce theme albums, do so in collaboration with certain great people. I have had great insight from the Holy Spirit as to what is necessary, so now I am meditating on being guided to obtaining those resources to achieve it. I reflect on the importance of not reaching out to those who do not merit one’s time and effort and focus on those who do, those who have shown they want your friendship, welcome it, and build it with them, friendships, sacred, time honored through thick and thin, where even if you disagree on anything, it won’t matter, you will still be friends even years later and care about each other always at at he end of the day and also appreciate each other, your gifts, your talents.
Death can come in many forms, this is the one we know of that is a permanent one in terms of the physical. Is that the only death? Sadly, or perhaps not so sadly, No.
Life is a series of cycles of embracing and letting go, of life and death. That is not to say that when a familiar situation of many years, or a love, a relationship dies there isn’t pain, or when a dream we had we find is not longer our dream and we find ourselves having a new set of dreams, that there is not anxiety, in a way a death. One will perhaps go through all the stages that one would go through as if there had been a physical death, go through a guilt trip, a series of what if questions, of could’ve, should’ve, and maybe even thinking how is it possible at this point in life to be starting all over again. It’s not unusual to be sad when you hear certain songs or read certain poems etc.., to be fed up with things not being changed fast enough, any range of emotions. Change, letting go, the ending of a whole chapter of one’s life, such as in a divorce or a career change mid life can be devastating, but also an opportunity, especially if you have opportunities staring you in the face to do new things, life life and fulfill dreams in ways you never did before. I tend to be very esoteric, so I do a lot of meditating and stuff like that, work out a lot of my stuff through dreams, even get a lot of info through dreams, forshadowing. Through my dreams I have reconciled the past, with the past cried it out, screamed it out etc…, main thing is, gotten the hell past it to live life and not be a paralyzed prisoner of the past.
Life maybe dealt you some ikky cards, or you dealt yourself some out of bad judgement, being to shy to stick up for yourself, to pursue your inner truth etc.. whatever the case. Well get the hell over it and start living, walls around you, your life, heart especially won’t do you or anyone any good, especially you. Protecting yourself is an illusion because you are not protecting yourself you are hiding if you think that putting up walls and not feeling is protecting yourself, it’s not. If you have to, find a time, each day for maybe a week or two or three or four, when you will be utterly alone, won’t disturb anyone, put on music that will totally pierce the walls, break them down, make you feel all the pain etc.. and don’t fight it, and for even 15 minutes, cry your eyes out, yell, scream, curse out everyone and anyone. Remember in the bible the guy with the donkey trying to get the donkey out of the ditch, cursing, maybe even God, pissed off, but he wasn’t just sitting there praying all fake and detached like other guy. Has letting God and everyone know ” I am pissed off dammit!!” The only one who can keep your life a misery, a dead inside etc.. misery, sad, fed up, a prisoner etc.. is you. Get it all out, harming no one, including you. Them dammit, take concrete steps to figure out what resources and opportunities, including good people who care and want to help are there for you to grab on to and make the journey to change your life. Do it!! Don’t spend your whole time stuck in what was, what might have been, could have been yadda yadda yadda, mamma mia, get a friggin clue and let’s not be perpetually fed up in life, okay!
Shalom and Amen
These are two new videos I added. I am starting my recordings from scratch as I am in my most comfortable with self zone and space yet, so far.
One is a song I had recorded, but this time I used chimes in the background along with my A Capella Improvisation of the melody. It’s called “Into The Misty Skies” The second is the recital of a poem on love with music in the background. I will be bringing you more recordings and poems durning week, so stay tuned.
Did you know that the heart is actually a mini brain? Pretty cool huh? Well, yeah unless you deny it and what you feel in terms of love and try to live life in a way that denies your true heart, true love whether it is vocation or personal.
We operate, and the universe operates on frequency, on vibration, this is why music affects us so much, certain sounds make us cringe, they carry vibration, even certain voices are pleasant to us, while others not so much. When one has lived life shut down, shut off, closed off, like a rote robot, stiff, the heart shut down, the spirit barely alive, just going through the motions of life, not really alive, doing what duty called to do, nothing more, nothing less, and others in your sphere are also living that way with you, there is a real problem. What happens when suddenly one encounters someone, something that truly brings one to life, that truly starts to open your heart etc.., but you are not used to that? If you suppress it, one is going to be a pressure cooker, and at some point all hell will break lose, that nuclear explosion or meltdown so to speak will occur. Not because anyone is a terrible person, but because the heart is a very important channel to inform us of whether one is alive, truly alive or just surviving, going through the motions, a zombie of sorts, an android seeming to be human and alive, but not so inside. Understand that when neurons in the heart are firing off, the heart gives off a powerful field around the body. Amazingly, this energy field produced by the heart is almost a thousand times more powerful than the one around the brain. The heart is a very powerful informer of whether we are alive, who we are truly connected to, or want to be connected to. With that kind of energy being emitted, when you try to be in denial of your own feelings, and you don’t take constructive, very important word, actions in a swift and timely manner to be true to your heart, a nuclear explosion or meltdown is a very real possibility and it can be ugly when that happens. Once one has determined that the heart has set itself a target, what makes it feel truly alive and I don’t mean just for a moment in the between the sheets, or just for the fame or attention in terms of vocation. I mean that connection that is something that has opened your heart etc.., given you wings in ways nothing has before, and then constructively, wisely, swiftly embracing that. Sometimes it’s okay to embrace that while we are still letting go of the old, of the deadwood, if that other opportunity has their arms open and has said, come in.
Whatever path you take in life, be sure you are not living like a zombie, an android, but truly with your heart etc.. open and that you have embraced very constructively that which brings you to life, and makes you alive in ways nothing else did before, in beautiful ways.
Namate, Shalom and Amen