There are times in life when in silence much is said and also in life there are times when there is a parting and much is left unsaid, things linger, hover in the air. May we all find closure to all things and situations, and may we find wisdom from the Holy Spirit in moments of silence and reflection.
Hope is what keeps us sustained so that we can achieve goals, and as long as we are remembering to nourish those goals with guidance from the spiritual realm of our Creator, His Holy Spirit, appreciating what we do have as we make the journey to recieve what is in the Lord’s plan for us, then Hope is a beautiful thing. At times yes, it can seem like a chilly place, and we can get discouraged, but that is when we need to seek out the Lord, keep doing what we are prompted by the Holy Spirit. Remember any prompting of anything, if it is not in keeping with ethics, integrity, clear moral boundaries, true to one’s self as a creation of the Most High, is not from His Spirit, but from our own Ego, desires or something else. As scripture says, test what you feel, and once you know it is from the highest realm of spiritual wisdom, don’t fight, move forward in hope and faith.
Replace the He with She, and that is what I gained, learned from the mess of my parent’s divorce and being used as a chess piece by both sides. I know my mom loved me, but she in different ways would also give me this message of “nothing lasts forever”. What I did was create a life of constant temporaries, of constant flux, which in turn wreaked emotional havoc on me and destroyed my well being. This even created instability in my faith life, made it hard for me to commit to any particular faith path, even within the Christian faith. When as a child you get the subliminal message and then reinforced message in different ways that nothing lasts forever, nothing can, even faith is hard to sustain on a deep level, even connection with God is hard to sustain on a deep level. Now 50 something I find myself as the poem says wishing I had something, something more long term in my vocational path, a companion that I had built lasting memories with. I wish I had not been given a message of nothing last forever, but that there are things that can last with intention, faith and right investment emotionally etc.. put forward. I wish I had been given that balance, taught that because I think I would have gone less in circles. Please remember that the phrase “Nothing lasts forever”, not really true. WIth right nurturing etc.., solid deep faith and spiritual life can last forever, healthy relationships can last a good long time. With marriage for example, even if the marriage ends, the relationship can still be one of friendship, caring and good will towards the other, if the intent and nurturing of it is there. Our spiritual body also is every lasting as Scripture tells us, so there are things that last forever. Take heart and never let that be what defines and drives your life, or you could end up going in circles, too many circles for too long.
This year my health really knocked me out and I did not get an advent wreath and we only put up the nativity scene, not even the tree, kept it simple as myself and my 93 year old mum have had a rough time health wise. However, if I had gotten the wreath it would have been great to have these prayers to reflect on. You can vary them, modify them to your own heartfelt words, but they are a nice model to work with.
“Write it on your heart
that every day is the best day in the year.
He is rich who owns the day, and no one owns the day
who allows it to be invaded with fret and anxiety.
Finish every day and be done with it.
You have done what you could.
Some blunders and absurdities, no doubt crept in.
Forget them as soon as you can, tomorrow is a new day;
begin it well and serenely, with too high a spirit
to be cumbered with your old nonsense.
This new day is too dear,
with its hopes and invitations,
to waste a moment on the yesterdays.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson
Sometimes fibromyalgia can be compared to being in a dark room. You make plans, want to, but then at the same time, the fibromyalgia is so unpredictable. Add to that the fact that now my 93 year old mom is starting to forget, leave the gas on, and adding more stress, something not good for anyone with fibro. Today I missed out on a day of heritage celebration because of the fibro messing with my memory in a sense.
I have set my cell phone alarm to go for doctor appointment before, since the alarm on the dresser clock doesn’t work any number of times. However, I was worried after mom again left the stove on and I then went in to get something and saw she had, and the shift in weather, made for a horrible night, so I set the alarm settings on my phone, but never saved them, so the alarm this morning never went off. If mom wakes up and she knows I have plans she will wake me if I have had a good night’s sleep, my blood pressure was high, sugar was off, arthritis pain acted up or just knows I really want to be there, but she had not slept well, , so she didn’t wake up either. I could get very discouraged, get all down and depressed, which wont help at all. Instead, I am blogging, listening to music that uplifts me, inspires me and I am planning on my activities for tomorrow, including a class in Music Appreciation at my coop, in the community room. This is not the first time that because of Fibromyalgia I have had to either do last minute cancelations or stuff like this has happened and it likely won’t be the last. What matters here is how I respond to these moments, these “crisis” moments, and if I choose to see them as crisis. Another example, I will do all I can to help a church I feel strongly about saving to thrive, but if after all has been tried it still folds, I can’t have a pity party for the church, what I can do is figure out how to make my faith life stronger and make the faith stronger. I can honor my heritage daily in different ways and it’s up to me to find constructive ways to do so. Life and fibromyalgia will throw curveballs and yet it’s not the curveballs that are the issue, it’s how I respond, that is the issue.