God, Determination, Faith Bigger Than

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Life has a lot of stuff it throws at you.  Me, it threw messy divorce of my parents, not  a heck of a lot of support for my gifts, talents, no real mentoring to help me find my way with any of that, lots of pain etc.. from the divorce, being caught in the middle of a lot of anger etc.. between dad’s family and mom, fibrmyalgia, debt, lack of life direction, lots of pain, lack of direction, of support, of any mentorship, all the pain that goes with all of this, and a not so healthy relationship with my mom who without realizing it, due to the language barrier she had and never remedied, failure to create a life outside of being my mom, created an unhealthy co-dependent relationship for her and me.

All of this could have totally chewed me up, spit me out, crushed me, but my faith, however imperfect, however choppy at times, my determination to find my way home to my purpose in life, to realize what my core gifts, talents were and put them to constructive use were stronger than any of this stuff.  Do I have great finances at 52, and a life as I wish it?  No? Am I with the love of my life? No, not yet.  However, that does not mean it not within my reach, it just means I have to stay the course, stay the path to get them and keep the faith, keep the determination and any negative destructive, self destructive crap voices that crop up, don’t listen tell them to take a hike go screw themselves, they are not taking me down. End of debate!!!