Life Lesson IX and X
These next two are ones I can relate to, especially releasing the past, making peace with it. I pretty much thought I had made peace with everything in my past, even my own screw ups. Last night, I was watching a reality program and as I watched these wonderful young people with developmental challenges plan their wedding, get an apartment to assert their adulthood and independence, be realizing certain dreams, having this community of friends, people in their lives fully encouraging this emancipation, their grit, determination. That wounded inner child came out and I cried, cried for all the unfulfilled dreams, all the screw ups etc.. and realized I have not really made peace with the past, and I need to do that. If I don’t I will always feel like I am not good enough etc… and will be running around in circles. If I am going to make really good decision present and future, I have to heal that inner child, reconcile with a past I don’t feel too happy about, wish had been different. I have some inner work to do to reconcile with the past, so I don’t screw up the present and the future. Not fun, not easy, but it is necessary. How can I be of help to others if I have not worked on healing myself. Physician Heal Thyself, even as you help and impact others with what skills you have.
Shalom and Amen