Instant Affinity, Now What?

Holy Ghost

You meet and there is this instant affinity, anointing almost, might not be flashy, balls of fire, it might be like a beautiful spiritual breeze and descending dove that comes upon you.  It might be something where you instantly click, flow, communicate etc.. and it feels like home, they feel like home.  If you are a sensitive you might sense they have that same affinity, same magnetic pull in your direction.  What’s the problem? Why not just assume everything will move at lightening speed and their heart, spirit soul will open up, they will acknowledge this to themselves, to you etc…? Well because it may not happen that way and it may not be that easy.

We have seven levels of consciousness according to metaphysical teaching and if you also look at catholic saints and their mystical experiences you see that we have layers of consciousness.  What does that mean?  It means just that, depth and layers.  For feelings and acknowledging them, well it can be tricky.  Feelings begin at a subconscious and psychic conscious level and work their way up to the conscious.  For some that happens very quickly, nothing blocks it and they have such an openness with the divine, with their own feelings, and the spiritual on every level that they are able to immediately have the subconscious feelings go to the conscious acknowledge them and constructively bring them out into the open.  Others, it is a lot harder to do that due to lack of trust in themselves, in others, in life etc.. due to negative experiences.  If they have had a life pattern of negative experiences, then they will have closed their heart, spirit and soul, not want to love or be loved, even if they do want that, yearn for it.  When they do start to have any deep emotions of friendship, of connection of anything with anyone on a subconscious and psychic level, their immediate instinct might be to block it, resist it, get all intellectual about it etc.., anything rather than face it, embrace it, express it to the other person, act on it.  That terrifies them, confronting anything emotional terrifies them because it might bring pain as far as they’re concerned.

What do you do when you know there is something there, underneath the surface, but they do not have the courage to express it, to speak up, to share etc…? Keep being you, keep connecting, pray, meditate,  hope that any walls that have been put up due to fear will come down and what is in the subconscious, those deeper hidden levels will surface, be acknowledged, fully embraced, fully expressed etc…If at some point you feel you have to let go and in terms of your heart move on, you do so.


Easy Flow Can Be Quite Exciting

Baptism of Fire

There is this assumption that for something to be “it”, a relationship, anything, it has to come like a blazing fire or with bells and whistles, but I am realizing that is not true.

That which God has anointed, which speaks most true to my spirit is turning out to have come in a manner that is like a stream of water that flows very naturally.  It is something I find I am able to flow with very easily, naturally.  Sharing, being me comes very naturally in this particular role and with a particular person, which is very beautiful.  Society and the media in particular has given this impression in the past that if a project, a vocation, a relationship, a friendship wasn’t begun with some kind of major “wham, bam” then forget it.  a true vocation, anointed project, even soulmate whether friendship or romantic life partner is not about “wham bam”.  It is about much more than that.  When something is meant to last long term it is something that flows, that you feel in sync with, you feel supported by and you also extend that.  There is a sense that you are not only nurturing the project, or relationship, but you are somehow being nurtured, inspired etc.. by it.  You can see yourself connected to that project, that friendship, that relationship even 50 years from now, even 100 years from now in some fashion. You want to nurture it, see it grow, find ways to have it grow and don’t feel it will be a major effort because there is common ground.  You find you can communicate when it comes to a project with those involved in the project very easily because those involved see you as an integral part of the project and vice versa.  If a relationship you see each other as equal parts of the whole, so you feel very comfortable communicating.   You also feel comfortable exchanging ideas, even in a project situation you feel that way when it is truly an anointed project.    There is a sense of willingness to compromise, to find a middle ground for the greater good of the organization, project, the relationship.   There is flow.  There is also honesty about how you view things etc.., not in a mean way, but honesty out of caring.  The persons involved in the project etc.. or the person in the relationship, they understand and feel they can also do the same.   You understand if they share something they are doing it out of caring, even if you don’t agree at all.  There is where the compromise comes in.  If it is a romantic relationship, or friendship, even one that has potential to go beyond friendship, this all applies. As for supporting each the other person’s dreams,  even a friend’s, well yeah, but also we should be honest and make sure they streamline their dreams, lives, so as to not burn out, that they don’t have a fragmented and cluttered life, end up in circles to nowhere.  That is an important part of caring, but how we present that is also important.   That also has to be kept in mind.

We have been fed this notion of what relationship, vocation is supposed to look like, supposed to be like feel like, “immediate wow, explosion wham bam city”.  Well no, lasting life long amazing stuff does not necessarily feel immediately like that, it may feel like the sweetest most sublime hot air balloon ride in the sky, can soar like an eagle kind of thing.  Remember that.

Who Says Virtual Friends Not Family?

Life and Liberty, God Bless America

The light shines within., going out in connection to the Divine Creator.

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Recent events, threw me for such a loop, still can’t quite fathom what happened.  I am certain neither I or the third party involved did anything suspect etc…

It is funny how I still find myself going WTH? Not only that, but as I look at three or four friendships, three of them distinctly virtual with people I met via a FB group whom I have not yet met in person, and one with someone whom I met when they were working here in the USA before going going back home to Europe I am taken aback.  These virtual people who I share so much with and who share much with me, there is no sense of being territorial about stuff.  I have shared so much of my hopes, dreams, plans, pretty much everything with them, and they have done the same.  We are pretty much an open book with each other and even shared dreams, so we can help each other interpret them.  There was such an openness about our lives, feelings about what was going on in our lives, including the rough patches.   When one has a success the other is truly happy for them, never thinks in terms of territorial, or has a notion of being territorial.   It’s a beautiful thing and I can only imagine if I liked in Europe how close we would all be, how we would work as a team, lift each other to great heights with our gifts, talents.  It would be awesome, or if they were all here and the support we would give each other through thick and thin, through sunshine and rain would be invaluable.  Friendship and family is not limited or determined by physical space, but rather by what is shared mutually, how you treat each other mutually, and so much more.  I am very clear in not accepting any friend request from anyone unless they are mutual friends of a FB friend I know well.  These people I count as my friends and family, we have shared so much, share so much of ourselves, and though we are up front with each other about what we think etc… we are open of heart, spirit and soul with each other.  We are friends and family, there to encourage, inspire, to give tough love as necessary, all of that, and yes we are in each other’s business, but because we care and we trust, so we share what is going on and seek each other’s input, guidance etc.., a beautiful thing.  It’s what family does, what friends do, what they are about, and like I said if we were close by we would likely share great times together.  I am grateful for these wonderful people with whom I am an open book pretty much and who share themselves, their lives, hopes, dreams, frustrations with me.   We are there for each other and in each other’s business through thick and thin.


Why A Strong Connection To That Someone?

Life and Liberty, God Bless America

The light shines within., going out in connection to the Divine Creator.


I have been trying to understand why I have  strong connection to a particular person, an artist whom I don’t interact with on a day to day basis, but from the moment we met at an event where he sang, there was this deep psychic connection.

Last night I had a dream in regards to him and another artist I also have connected to strongly on a psychic level, talented lady.  I see her on a more regular basis.  I wondered why this connection why so strong.  Chemistry is one of course, common worldview, culture, faith all that stuff, on a psychic level was picked up by me and him immediately and an ethereal cord was formed.  After dealing with different people, including what I am now calling butterflies that flutter here and there and everywhere, collect a million people to their “know you” list etc… I realize what also draws me to this person and them to me.  Focus, a sense of focus, which I think for both of us is very important.  Though I did have a bit of a maze in terms of my vocational path, the one thing that was always consistent was the music, poetry, the artistic side path, that as I suppose subconsciously the ultimate goal, to be the inspirational artist/coach.  I also realize that the other common ground is that both of us realize, myself perhaps realizing it a bit later than I should have, the importance of streamlining, of having a particular outlet and venue you consistently work, even create for yourself, with to achieve your goals, not be like a butterfly, fluttering everywhere or flirting with everything and not focused on anything.  This person has worked with the same venue for longevity and that says a lot about their ethics as an artist, not to say they have not made changes, as change is part of life, and hopefully in order to grow artistically if they do have to make further changes they will do so even if that does mean leaving things behind, and do so constructively, that including forming new creative partnerships.  However, they are consistent and focused in their work, the venues they work with etc…, they are not farfalle whose wings flutter all over the place.  That’s to me an important quality in a person I think.  Doesn’t mean the person is boring because you can be stable and yet not be boring, don’t need to be a butterfly to be interesting, or for life to be interesting.  

I think that focus, streamlining, not wanting a cluttered life is what creates this psychic cord that is strong and will likely be strong for a very long time.  Will we ever come to artistic collaboration?  I hope so, as it would really be I think with the chemistry we have a potentially awesome thing.  God will see to it at the right time, right venue etc…, but it is up to them to reach out, rather to reach out back when they are ready to do so for collaboration.    There are others that I also have common ground with but there is not that psychic connection with and I wondered why and it likely is because they are like farfalle, butterflies.  When one is like a butterfly whose wings just brush the surface here, there and everywhere, no deep connection to people, someone like me, can’t make a deep intuitive connection, not readily, not easily.  For the deep psychic connection I have made the future will tell as to what creative collaborations occur and how they unfold.  Until then I will continue with my projects and plans, seeking to inspire etc… 


What Does It Mean To Let Go


Inspiration Peace and Love

We often hear that you need to let go, especially when it comes to relationships that went south, sour had a sad etc.. ending, broke your heart and all that.  What does that mean? 

As I said the Holy Spirit has been having me do a lot of reflection this Lenten season and this is a question that has come up in my spirit, my soul.  I thought about a relationship that has haunted for though it is not a part of my life anymore, not in the sense of they are in my day to day life, or that I see them etc..  Yet as I said in a previous post, memories you can’t run away from, and so memories are there always.  When I say I have let go, what does that mean?  Does it mean I have no memory of them, don’t know what they look like, or would not recognize them if I saw them in the street?  No, of course not.  Here is what it does mean.  I don’t blame, resent or any of that.  I am able to look at it all, even the not so great stuff with detachment and realize it takes two to tango, and two to make a mess of things.  Both of us messed up for different reason, but I can stand back now and say that he was not the villian and that it was all on him that things got messed up.  That’s big deal, to be able to step back and say that my insecurities played a part in things going all wonky, along with one or two other factors, but not the main point.  Main point is the letting go and what that means, this being a part of it.  What is the other part of it?  I can see their face on social media, and a comment they made, something they posted, be pissed about the content, hit back hard, but at the same time smile and laugh about it, thinking, whatever, just them being them.  Then I can also think, what would I do if I were walking along one day and came face to face with them? What if they said they wanted to go to lunch, what then?  I can honestly say I could go to lunch, sit in the park with them and hear them out, have an open heart conversation and go from there no bitterness, nothing like that.  Any negative feelings, attachments etc….that is what I have let go of, and that means I have been able to step back and see that I can’t make them the villain in this, nor can they do it to me, both of us messed up, have to take responsibility, forgive each other and ourselves.  Letting go to me anyway means this, not sure what it means to others, but this is what it means to me.


What Is Friendship, Love?

Made me reflect on love.

I must have listened to this song I don’t how many times in my life, but for some reason, in the past three days it struck a cord with me, one part of one of the Karate Kid movies in particular.

The end scene when the Karate Kid is down and looks beaten by his rival in the karate match.  Suddenly the girl he loves gets up and starts beating the mini drum and then his teacher, surrogate dad, then others and it’s a chain reaction.  That moment tells us what love is about.  A big part of what love is about, what friendship is about is giving courage to the other person and making them see the potential within themselves that they may not see and wanting that to shine.  It’s not about the material gifts, or about sex in a romantic union, not that it doesn’t matter, but the essence of love is beating the drum when they are down to lift them up and giving them that sense of courage to lift themselves up, to fly and shine bright, hopefully they take you beside them on that journey and they do the same for you.  That is what love is about at the core.

Embracing Mary, Embracing Me

As I listened to this, something about it struck a cord, and at first I was not sure why.  Mary was given a path, was asked to follow a path, mother of Messiah, and that was no easy task.  In life each of us is given gifts, and the road to discovering those gifts and then accepting the path we are here to follow, doing so in a way that is balanced, in wellness, authenticity to self, not being what others want us to be, what we think we are etc.., but to be what we are meant to be in God’s eyes is one heck of a journey.   I always knew I was here to be an artist to create, write, produce all of that, and to do so in the spiritual realm, in some way, some form.  It was scary and even though I got standing ovations at ammeter nights, did well at poetry readings, professionally being a performing artist, recording artist etc.., ministering through the arts, teaching through the arts, that was way scary, up till recently and now, well not scary, not really.  When you realize God wouldn’t give you a path that he didn’t know you could follow and when you find the right person/s to walk the path with you, then Ave Maria, AMen and Hallellujia.  Yes, the initial reaction might be “huh, WTH?” Once you get over that, the next thing is “okay Lord, let’s rock and rock!!!!” It’s pretty cool, pretty amazing how peaceful, yet exciting it is when you make that choice to “rock and roll” for the path he has placed in front of you, even more so when you have great people with you making this journey.