Online Potentials and Perils

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Like many things in life the Internet has its’ yin and yang, potentials, and perils so to speak. Instagram is an example of that.  I have had several gentleman follow me after posting videos to promote my blog, my music. 

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind interacting with fans once in a while, but these guys don’t seem to come in with a lot of maturity.   You have those that are like a bull in a china shop as the saying goes and immediately bombard you with personal questions, or those who immediately start calling you sweetheart, honey, babe, all this stuff, which is not appropriate unless you two are officially a couple for some time or are engaged. Then you have those who start off seeming nice enough, great, then after a few chats declare their love, are ready to upheaval their life for you, move to the ends of the earth for you.  They don’t know your background, your history, anything about your life, family, and you have not verified anything about them, their background etc…, yet they are declaring forever their love and wanting a commitment.   That is not realistic, definitely not a sign of maturity.  You can look at a photo, see someone’s videos online, all that and love certain qualities that come across, their eyes, their smile, you can feel something sparked, not saying you can’t, and when you talk online, chat you might feel very much at ease with them and they with you.  That does not constitute being in love or that the relationship is solidified in any substantial way.  Relationships take some time to build, you have to seek common ground, really know you will be there for each other through thick and thin, and all of that takes time, takes spending actual face to face time with each other.  Knowing a person past and present is not done in a few chats, falling in love, real Agape, and beyond love is not done in just a few chats.  Also, if someone is going to make any choices in life about changing anything in their life, it has to be for them, not you as the reason to run from where they are at now.  When any relationship on line is attempted to move at the speed of lightening to “love you to the end of time” or anything like that and they want a firm commitment of partnership, commitment, red flag.  For me anyway, I promised myself and God that when and if I were to make that solemn commitment it would be made with maturity, deliberation, prayer etc.., and the person would be one of like mind, goals and also one of maturity.  One can be spontaneous and still have maturity, but there is a difference between mature spontaneity and immature impulsiveness.  It’s important to know the difference. 

I am  open to love and marriage all of that, even through Instagram, but it has to be with a person who has a certain level of maturity and of course a MAGA Patriot, one of like mind.  If I sense any red flags I need to pay attention.


How To Have Total Peace, Mean Total

Peaceful Retreat

Total Nirvana, total peace 24/7, bliss 24/7, no cares, no worries, no criticism, just pure bliss 24/7, sounds good, ahhhhhh. Okay, well if you can purchase a holodeck contraption, create this perfect place, never leave, with ya!   Long time ago a wise philosopher said this ” There is only one way to avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing and be nothing.” , basically you would have to cease to be.  We don’t live as robots, and we don’t all have the same experiences, so we won’t see things the same way, not even within our own family.  Sometimes because of childhood stuff or stuff that happened in our younger years may be always or frequently engaging in Conflict avoidance, will avoid any kind of conflict, even to the point of making any decisions in one’s own life, or taking a stand on anything.  The problem is if you are in that category, then you will just go anywhere your emotions lead you in that moment, or where the cultural tide is going in that moment. 

Let’s look at inner conflict, which I think can be often the root to outer conflict.  Relationships, do we stay or go, do we stay in the safety of what is or pursue a path that in our heart of hearts we know is one much happier for all in the long run, those kind of choices can be a cause for inner conflict.  Relationship choices without fullness of information or context, so that you have a nagging something in the back of your mind, though you have a strong pull to them.  Since you don’t really know them, have not taken the time to know them etc.. not all the pieces of the puzzle are there, so it’s not a fully informed decision, a rushed one, maybe there are certain red flags that are very obvious to friends, family, even to you subconsciously, but you are ignoring them.  This is true in any kind of relationship, or decision, even professional ones.  There is also the inner conflict as you make your spiritual journey.  I firmly embrace the Bible the layers of truth it has to teach including metaphysical, not that we are God, or can be Gods or anything like that, but on a philosophical level, on an esoteric level, as well as the practical applications, as it did for creating the Republic, our Republic.  There are very practical applications, even an understanding of human nature to be gained.  I also embrace Jesus as Personal Messiah, one who if I can truly have a relationship with, truly understand his teachings, that of the Apostles, in context of the the OT, it can be very beneficial.  However, I also want to learn about meditation techniques, and Zen meditation, Zen philosophy.  Will that sit well with everyone in my circle, no. Could that bring me inner conflict?  It could if I let it, if I allow myself to get caught up in that storm, up to me. If I have the mindset that if you even try to challenge me on this, it’s war, well then it is war, going to be war.  I have set up my heart, spirit and soul, but at the same time my elderly mom has health issues, so if I were to engage in such a war with those closest to us, that would hurt her.  You see how my inner conflict would have a ripple effect and become a conflict beyond my own inner world.  Inner war can create all kinds of ripples in the pond, though that does not mean you don’t stand up for yourself or what you believe in.  However, one of the things that I myself am working on is what size stone to throw in the pond at the time, so I don’t cause a tsunami. Conflict within is often the first line of conflict, even in the career arena.  You may feel divided loyalties if you see something that does not seem kosher, part of you is feeling that you should speak up, but that part is in conflict with the part that feels you have bills to pay, family to support, don’t blow it, lay low.  If you get tense etc…, starts to create friction in the workplace with others, so inner conflict unresolved will still find a way to manifest and create issues.  Remember the adage, “Physician heal thyself”, always.

Inner conflict, aligning our heart spirit and soul need to be the first order of things because until we do that, we can’t find harmony with the external.  Those three aspects of self have to resolved, aligned etc.., then external conflicts can more easily be resolved. 

Shalom and Amen

Have To Let It…

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No one likes pain and as someone who deals with fibromyalgia every day, pain on some level every day, it’s not fun.  Childhood lots of pain there, dad leaving when I was a kid, lots of baggage there, my relationship with my mom, complicated, lots of love, BFFs but also lots of tension because we clash and since she always had limited English skills depended a lot on me because of that, I have always lived with her. Relationships, not a lot of good stuff there either to remember, some moments here and there, though that really is down to my own not so wise choices. 

Pain is something we don’t like, and emotional pain, spiritual pain, even less, so the tendency might be to numb it, run from it, but that never resolved, never leads to growing, understanding, discerning etc.. When emotional etc.. pain is there, even some levels of physical pain, not talking major levels, but small scale, rather than run to numb it right away, what if we let ourselves hurt, let ourselves engage with the pain through meditation, prayer, as we listened to specific meditation music or sacred music?  What if we engaged to understand where the pain was coming from, really coming from?  Is the pain really about the fact that a person is no longer in your life, that they are not “loving you” the way you want them to love, want you etc..? Is that really it, maybe it is, and maybe it isn’t?  Is it really that you didn’t get the job, promotion etc…, maybe, possibly?  Maybe if you have this constant pain and aching within, it’s not about that, but about baggage you never faced, came to terms with.  Maybe we never let ourselves hurt, bleed and let go.  It’s not comfortable to do.  It’s not a comfortable journey, looking deep into our heart, spirit and soul.  If we feel resentful about stuff we have to do for another, for anything in our life that is ongoing, why is that? For some it might be that anger with self at lost opportunities, opportunities not taken, for others it might be something different. The letting go part is crucial, looking deep and discerning is crucial, even with physical pain, so for example if we are constantly putting yourself in situations where we are ending up hurt, peril, why is that, something might be going on if we are constantly breaking something, spraining something etc…one too many close calls.  If we refuse to see the doctor when others are saying we really need to go because we look like hell and we know we feel like hell, but are ignoring signs that something is not right.  We may find all kinds of excuses, too busy, whatever.  What is really going on, really?  We might be having a busy season at work, but no time to schedule a doctor’s appointment, really? Don’t think so.   Now there are centers, places open Saturday, so no excuses.  Appointments can even be made online.  Even when we get news in life that is not so great, hurt, bleed, find a room, place where you can cry, scream, punch some pillows, write a letter to God about how pissed off you are, get it out, fine, bleed, then figure out constructively how to move forward, move on.  If there is baggage from the past, where you feel the not good enough etc..self talking or that of others kicking in you write to self, “Dear Negative Self, shut the hell up with all this negative crap, no one is buying what you are selling.  I know as a child of the Most High Creator of this Amazing Universe what you are saying is bull.  Yes I make mistakes, but I am willing to learn from them, so take that and stuff it”  Read it over and over, envision all that negative self talk, and all negative behaviors, patterns, we all have them, hence sin, missing the mark, being incinerated. 

Hurt, bleed, move forward, move on!

Why The Future Gets Scary

Future is Scary

Most of the time I am not too worried about the future, but there are those moments when I see my mom 94 whom I reside with and she seems frail, ready to go.  At those times I have to admit I get just a little bit scared.  I wish I had had more direction, solid mentoring in my past with my gifts as an artist etc… and gotten my finances in better shape.  In those moments when I am not seeing any prosperity from my endeavors, doing what I love, I look at my options for the future, those twilight years, it gets scary.

Now, there are no worries really financially speaking because with my mom’s pension and my benefits we are okay.  However, I realize that when she does pass on, that changes things and I will have to make some tough choices, including whether to stay where I am or sell and go live in a 55+ community.  It’s a choice that will have to be made at some point whether that is sooner or later, the Good Lord knows, that’s his department.  I could go into a panic every time this happens and fear the future, panic and decide I should forget all about the artistic path, and coaching, figure out a conventional way to get financially secure, on track so to speak.  On the other hand I could keep doing what i am doing, pray, meditate and embrace a prosperity mindset and trust that the prosperity is on its’ way.  We fear because the future is the unknown, it has any number of variables, some of which we can’t control.  I can’t really control whether people purchase my music etc…, contribute to this blog, take my seminars, all I can do is offer what I offer to the best of my ability.  As for where I end up, well there I do have some control, even if to some it is dictated by finances.  I have already started looking at these types of communities, which ones my instincts tell me I should look at at some point in the near future.  We often get into a funk or panic in the moment and if we let that moment be something we marinate in for a long while, we will feel like we have no control, none.  That’s pretty sad because we always have some control at some point and the only obstacle is realization of that fact.  I hope as we learn to be more intuitive etc… that will change.















































































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Who Do I Give My Power To?

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This week and next is a week pretty much full with doctors appointments, and the gluten free and fomap diet continue.  Though the meds do help with the pain etc..I have to be always on guard.  Why be on guard? 

Well, Fibromyalgia is a syndrome, not a cold you have just for a few days and then it goes away, so I have to be aware of that yes, but I also have to be aware enough not to give it full power over my life.  If I give it full power, then the fatigue, the constant fatigue and pain though controlled to some extent by the meds, would have me sleeping a good part of the day, especially since with this syndrome we have trouble getting to sleep and sleeping soundly through the night.   Despite the thorns of this syndrome, I refuse to let it overtake me or my life, so I push through to write and record, to inspire.  I now have between bandcamp, number1music, and soundcloud over 300 followers and subscribers  That’s pretty good, and a good feeling to know I am impacting lives, especially when I get the emails that let me know.  I am blessed, but like I said it would be easy to let the Fibromyalgia overtake me and add to this the fact that I am also having to take care of my 94 year old mom whose English is limited, and is starting to get forgetful about stuff, leave the water on, the stove.  I meditate, I discuss things like this with her doctor, have a great support system that has my back and hers.  I am even filling out a medical proxy for her.  I am doing what I can and still taking care of myself to the best of my ability, which is wise.  Think of being on a plane, if something happens, they always say to have the adults use the oxygen first because if the adult is not okay, how will the kids be okay.  Taking care of one’s self is important as one makes this journey through life’s sometimes muddy waters.  It is up to you not to let any of that overwhelm, rather inspire in constructive ways.

What about you? what issues do you have going on in life?  What burdens do you feel you are carrying?  I am not saying they are not burdensome, but it is up to you to decide if they are going to overwhelm and drown you.  You need to step back, and determine what you need to move through it, and be whole in some way shape or form.  you need to figure out how you are going to be okay , and productive in spite of the crap going on with you, or around you.   No one can do it for you, but you can seek and should seek the right support system. Please be wise and don’t go to anything radical.  There are good people who can mentor and coach you as you try to navigate life’s storms. 


Strong Mind Roadmap PIV


What else makes for a healthy mind? Where we put our energy.  Learning from the past is a good thing, and having goals for the future is also a good thing.  However a healthy mind doesn’t obsess over either, but rather learns from the past, has some clear goals for the future, with flexibility about the roadmap and timeline to getting there, and the bulk of the energy is on the here and now the day to day steps necessary to get from A to Z.  Being stuck in the past is a really depressing place to be, especially if we are going to be beating ourselves up about things, or idealizing it in a way that it wasn’t that way and longing for what really wasn’t, missing out on the opportunities right in front of us.  Learning from the past doesn’t mean a lifetime of beating ourselves up over mistakes made, nor does it mean blaming everyone else for our screw ups, like former candidate Hillary Clinton does, like many of us at times do and some always have a tendency to do.  It’s important to take responsibility for the fact that we do make mistakes, make some wrong choices and those choices have consequences, even grave ones.  Also, don’t try to pass the buck as they say.  We can realize we  messed up and clean up the mess responsibly, constructively., and yes acknowledge that there were outside influences, but take responsibility for how we reacted to that, particularly once we are  at a certain age and point of our lives.  The other thing that’s important is not to do a comparison to others and to celebrate the success of others, especially if we have had any kind of an influence on their journey to that success.  If we start to compare, keep score etc…, we are going to become very bitter, and that is when the Marxist, Communist all must be equal, life is not fare and everything must be equal etc.. mindset comes a knockin.  Problem with that is life is not designed for that, even with gifts, talents, skills etc.., God gave different skills, gifts etc… to different people.  He didn’t make us all the same, not in our features, height, not in anything.  He gave us different features, gifts, talents.  To envy another for their success, waste that energy on that rather than moving forward with your own life, goals etc… is foolishness and makes for an unhealthy mindset. Celebrate, don’t envy, don’t waste time and energy on that.


Anti Christ, False Prophet Oh MY!

Confused Face

I have been having an interesting exchange on twitter with a man who tweeted me that Trump was the Biblical Anti-Christ and I have been trying to clarify for him that that does not add up.  This is one of the problem with getting into these end time prophecies and getting all caught up in when is Christ coming back who is the anti-Christ etc.. you start seeing anti Christ everywhere. Even Obama and Hillary I was told were the anti-Christ.  Problem is they don’t fit the criteria.  I don’t know what Bible they are reading, but even Christians I have had to say to them, no you are way off base.  I may not agree with liberal progressive views and policy all that, but that has nothing to do with right theology.   What of the anti Christ and the False Prophet.

The False Prophet.  If one traces their origin not to the Reformation or any pastor or church founded in the last 50 or 100 years, but through the Catholic Church and Apostolic Succession and back to the Apostles, then the False Prophet is a Pope influenced by forces not of God or one as close to him as possible that is influenced by dark forces to lead the Pope who leads the Church and thus in uniting with the Anti-Christ the world into a royal catastrophe though sin given a pass almost, which would lead the world into a royal mess, all in the name of Social Justice and all that crap.  With the pressure on churches to force God to confirm to their whims, not hard to see that happening and thus the Vicar of Christ becoming a false Prophet and since the Vatican also does a lot of diplomatic and humanitarian work with nations, this could happen.  That leads us to the Anti-Christ.  There is so much speculation on who he is etc.., so let’s clarify, here is his profile and resume, bible vetted.

He will come from the Tribe of Dan.

He will be born in the Middle East. – He may be Arab Jew, that is my own instinct, very strong one

His mother will be a harlot possessed by the devil.

He will be conceived by a man, not by the devil.

He will be possessed by the devil like his mother.

He will be familiar with all the magical arts.

He will be a wonder child, endowed with great intelligence and memory.

He will be assisted by the devil throughout his life.

He will be utterly wicked.

He will claim to be the true Son of God the Messiah.

The Jews will accept him as such.

He will be made King of the Jewish Nation.

He will re-build Jerusalem and make it a magnificent city.

Jerusalem will be the capital of the world.

He will not be an atheist; he will believe in God.

He will re-build the Temple of Jerusalem. – It may not be in the grand scale it was in biblical times, that would take a long time and lots of money, but maybe a smaller scale model of it

He will sit in the Temple to be adored as God.

He will conquer the whole world. -This could mean literal or it could mean he is so charismatic he is made head of a new world government created via the UN or something like that

Those who accept him will bear his mark, or sign.

One-third of the conquered peoples will refuse to obey him.

He will persecute and he will torture them with every refinement of cruelty, and he will make sure that they do not die so that the tortures may be prolonged.

But God will not forsake the Faithful.

Some nations will be spared the persecution of Antichrist.

He will rule the world for three and a half years.

He will work great wonders and deceive many.

He will be opposed by Henoch and Elias.

He will put to death Henoch and Elias.

Henoch and Elias will come to life again on the third day, and ascend into Heaven. He will say that they are sorcerers and that he can bring them back to earth.

He will rise in the air by his magical powers, but will be almost immediately struck down by Saint Michael, and killed.

The Jews will finally accept Christ as the Messiah.

Some time will be given to the human race to do Penance before the Last Judgment.

Now that we have a profile, can we stop with pointing fingers at US  born Presidents etc.. or European born ones, even ones born on the African continent.  Thank You.  As for when Jesus returns, for goodness sakes he said he didn’t even know, only God the Father knows, He’s keeping it a closely guarded secret, so live life as sin free as you can asking for help from the Holy Trinity, Father, Son, Holy Spirit, all the Angles and Saints of God, every morning and before you go to bed.  Let God take care of the end days stuff!!



Strong Mind Roadmap Part II


Last time I covered three aspects of a strong mind, soul, keeping in mind there is the conscious and subconscious.  What are the next three aspects to this.

Don’t wallow in whatever crap is going on, or in negative emotions, pain etc…For the past three days due to TMJ and arthritic inflammation from my osteoarthritis, I have been in pain, face swollen, hurts like heck to chew anything.  I could be going into depression, woe is me, ahhh poor me, ohhh why me, why the fibromyalgia had to hit me, boo hoo, cry me a river.  Don’t get me wrong, it is no fun, it’s annoying, frustrating, not fun, but wallowing rather than going to get my overdue haircut, and running needed errands won’t change the situation, won’t take the fibro away.  I choose to keep moving forward, understanding that I do have to respect my body’s limits, but still within that move forward.  No wallowing!  Be kind, and that can mean giving a smile, saying thank you to the person who serves you coffee, telling them to have a great day.  Kind can come in small packages.  We can all do better I am sure in this area, me as well.  I don’t always have the patience I should, maybe it’s the fibro frustration, but I know I can do better.  Bitterness, anger etc.. that constantly in your heart, spirit and soul are really a heavy load to carry.  I did a piece I believe on the difference between anger and righteous anger, so please check that out.  Take calculated risks.  Notice the word calculated, not impetuous, impulsive, reckless risk, calculated.  You look at the pros and cons, risk and reward factors and you see if the pros outweigh the cons and rewards would outweigh the risks.  You don’t for truly important decisions go rushing in like a blind fool, that’s not courage that’s just being a moron and a blind fool.  Learn the difference and take it from me the sooner you learn that, the better.  Courage is not about jumping in all the time into every situation based on feelings and emotions in the heat of the moment.  That’s immaturity.  I hope that we all learn the difference, but hopefully sooner rather than later in life.  If we can look at these things, maybe do a life scan and see where we might have wallowed etc.. .and how it led us down a not so great path, we can maybe not repeat that pattern, work on changing patterns.  I hope to have a workshop on that in conjunction with the wellness wheel a life seminar in September in Manhattan, NY.  I hope you will look at how maybe you have been in regards to these areas of the mind, soul and see where you might need to do a rethink.





































































































































Being of Strong Mind, Roadmap? Hmmm


We are seeing a lot of instability in our youth, in our society and I do believe lack of a strong faith life and spiritual center contribute, but there are also personal attitudes and behaviors that need to be looked at for sound mind and spirit.  What are they?  I am going to touch on three of them today.

  1. Move on
  2. Keep Control
  3. Embrace Change

If you look at these there you realize they are interconnected.  To keep control, to embrace change, you have to be able to move on, to move forward from past to present and present to future.  You have to be able to keep control and work through in very constructive ways any anger, rejection etc… and when you can do that, you can embrace change.  You can take the biblical passages related God makes all things work out for good, to heart and look at how that situation can be for a greater good, even your own personal growth and development indirectly perhaps.  Perhaps it made you stronger, it showed you as they say when the chips are down what your made of, when push comes to shove, what you do, how you handle, do you have the personal, spiritual etc… tools to handle it constructively.  If you didn’t then, or don’t now, if you can see that, you can seek right guidance to gain those tools.  This is something we should be teaching children from a very young age, all parents, all schools etc.. should be teaching our youth that rejection, part of life, all the aspect of life, good, bad, ugly, people not agreeing with your views, you not agreeing with theirs, all part of life, part of the journey, and if we make good decisions, choices, have a strong spiritual, center, moral compass etc.. we will hopefully make more good ones than not and life will have more good than not.  We also have teach moving on etc.. in the sense that you can’t control what others feel, think, how stupid they sometimes act, and not everyone will like you, as your parent etc.., guess what, I don’t always like you, love you, but don’t always like how you act, behave, and I won’t as love as we are both this planet and breathing and you won’t always like me, that’s fine.  We need to teach them that this is true throughout life with people.  As for the past, teach them that the past, while having important lessons to teach is not a place we should get stuck in or brooding about.  We need to grasp this ourselves and pass it on to future generations. 

These are the first three of 18 points I’ll be discussing, so stay tunes and God Bless.




Who Am I At the End of the Day?

Photo 2015-11-14 at 23.00

As I walk the streets on my way home and look at the sky, tinged with clouds and pearls of rain that are gently falling on my face I start to think about my music, by blog a number of things for some reason and I find myself asking a question.  I find my self asking myself “who am i?”  I did a podcast interview and when I was asked why I do what I do, the blog, the music all of that, I really didn’t have to think about it, my heart spirit and soul, spoke.  I do it because I want to be of service, I want to honor the gifts the Lord gave me.  I don’t do it for fame and to to be uber wealthy.  I don’t do it to prove anything to anyone, not even family, since I could care less what they think of me, what they think in general, sorry but that’s the truth.  I am realistic enough to know they will always go Left, and I will always go Right.  That will never change, so it is what it is.  Today I realized something.  It’s true that the fibromyalgia due to often crashing and different health stuff that has come up has impeded my being active in faith life on a day to day basis in terms of Mass and all that, and at home I do meditate and all that, which I do daly always with thanks and in Christ Consciousness, in gratitude for what he did for us.  If I were to define in a nutshell who I am at the core right before saying artist and minister/coach, it would be this:  A Child of God, A Woman of Faith, A Warrior for Christ.  That is not to say I have not had one or two crisis moments or lapses in terms of choices made, even the saints and apostles had their flaws.  However at the core, this is who I am, this is my identity, and everything I do stems from that and from a holistic biblical truth, which has shaped my firm worldview in terms of governance of nations for them to be Capitalist, Federalist, Constitutional, Democratic Republics, with clear separation of powers etc.., with very few exceptions, like war situation, something of that nature, or true obstructionism that is causing the nations’s important business to stagnate and is thus harmful to the nation.  Even then anything done has to adhere to the Constitution and Originalist interpretation of it as per the Federalist Republic.  Understanding my identity in Christ, in the faith is important because it provide the anchor, the roadmap and more.  I hope to adhere wisely to the roadmap and identity in all things and aspects of my life.  In the songs poems I wrote, in all my work, seeking to inspire, empower and awaken.