The Reclaim and What If Syndrome

Letting Go Never Easy, But Necessary

Life passes by and suddenly people find themselves older and wiser hopefully, but also filed with what I call the reclaim and what if syndrome.

There is the reclaim syndrome which is about the notion of reclaiming one’s youth and it may play out in any number of ways or even be where one has this denial that one is not 20 something and certain dress codes and behaviors are just not appropriate, just because someone in Hollywood might think it is, doesn’t make it so, or just because it captures men’s or women’s attention doesn’t make it so.  It can play out in how money is spend, what is purchased, any number of ways.  I hate to break to everyone, one’s younger years are not returning, not to say you can’t have a young heart and enjoy being active and being around young people, no.  That’s different than trying to be 20 or 25 if your 45 or 55, trying to live those years in a way that you didn’t back then now, that just makes you look like a fool or something like that.  Then there is also the what if and trying to live out unrealized dreams some of which are truly not realistic and can not be realized once for any number of reasons, or can be realized, but one is not seeing the most obvious way and opportunity to do so right in front of them, so is like a chicken without a head running around trying to weave a web of connections etc.. to realize a dream of unfilled potential and creative expression in so many different ways that there is no singular venue of extraordinary focus and success being given at least 80% dedication  

I have had my moments of what if and have realized that it does me no good to have the what if syndrome and certainly trying to make up for any lost youth etc… is stupidity, would be stupidity beyond words.  I am not 20, or 25 or even 35, I am 50 something.  Not to say I can’t enjoy life, and when I am around young people can’t feel young and enjoy that time with them etc..  I am also realistic about the fact that that time has passed and I have to understand that.  As for my artistic aspirations and any dreams not realized of grandeur etc…, well who says a Broadway stage, or a theatre stage or big film screen has to be the point of grandeur?  If my music, poetry, artist blog reaches millions, and I get steady support financially each month to pay my bills and have a decent comfortable life, I am able to be a voice through my inspiration blog, be an inspirational speaker, if that leads to that within the faith and Italian American community., then would that not be a solid achievement?  For that to happen I still have to have some kind of a solid plan for what I am doing because without some kind of a solid plan for these blogs, the future of these blogs and my journey as an artist and inspirational coach, all I am doing is flying on a wing and a prayer, which is okay sometimes, but not for the long haul, so a plan is important and I am working on one.  I have to be realistic in that whatever dreams of grandeur I had now have to be channeled in a very focused manner, through one or two venues, and my energy into making those work, success, thrive and prosper.  Butterflies that flutter all over the place are lovely and that is great when you are in your twenties and have zero maturity, but at a certain point, even with the what if syndrome you have to get the hell over it and get very disciplined, focused, learn to be spontaneous within that parameter to succeed, thrive and succeed.   That is what I hope to do.